No more Oh Captain My Captain Colplay :( |
Cause he used to ruuuuuuuuuuuuule the world......oh wait , former captain Coldplay has been demoted from his captain role. Coldplay who initially took over as the new leader, was very impressive in the early going of the season, but now has been forced to give up the C. He is now regulated to a 4th line checking forward position.
Former Koolaid Killer and apparel manager Quad Skates ponder the nonexistent Coldplay, "In the beginning of the season all I heard on facebook was Coldplay scored this amount of goals, or pictures of his tron helmet on a motorcycle deking in and out of the opposing team.
Coldplay on a breakaway |
The stats don't lie. In the first three games of the season, Coldplay had 9goals and 6 assists. Since then he has 2 goals and is a -12 in 5 games. Some think, the injuries have had an affect on Coldplay, with the numerous facial injuries. Coldplay received 5 stitches on his forehead with a high stick, and then 2 stitches on his Abe Lincoln chin.
Sour Puss Eric had a different view on the situation, "I think Coldplay just sucks. I don't understand how a bubble hockey player was consider the captain of this team. Maybe, we need to get Coldplay a long stick and just let him twirl around in the slot."
Management has decided to promote up and coming superstar defense-men Stilts as the new captain. "Stilts is a great stall-worth at the back end. His calm demeanor, is a great influence to the rest of the Koolaid Killers bench. We've watch Stilts develop from his early years as a Whaler and like his progression as a player. The era of Captain Coldplay is officially dead. Long live Stilts!"
The Koolaid Killers ended their recent losing streak on Monday night with a 8-5 victory and will end the regular season tonight against Sunnyvale. Currently in second place, the Killers will try to finish strong as one of the top two seeds.
Kill Koolaid Kill!
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