Thursday, October 21, 2010
Shop Rite Orders a Swiss Cheese Ronda
At the local Shop Rite Deli a man walks to the counter and places an order.
"Yes, Can I have a pound of salami, a half pound of ham, a pound of american cheese, and a pound of liverwourst" the man asks
The Deli Clerk responds to the man "Will that be all?"
The Man thinks to himself and remembers one more item on his deli list. "Oh, I alsmost forgot can I get a half pound of Swiss Cheese?"
Their is a silence, that overcomes the busy Shop Rite Deli. The Deli Clerk looks around and with a stern face replies to the man. "Sir. We haven't had swiss cheese in Shop Rite Delis for ages."
"What do you mean? I just came here last week and got a half pound of swiss." the man responds.
"Well, its a very long story. The management apparently had a fight with a customer who would buy swiss cheese and eat it in the store. It got to the point, that other customers would mimic his swiss cheese eating habits as well. So, they realize to stop ordering Swiss Cheese, and the problem would go away. But it didn't. I'm going to have to ask you now to stop talking about our non-selection of swiss cheese products" the deli clerk explains.
The Man confuse about the lack of Swiss Cheese, takes his pound of salami, half pound of ham, pound of American Cheese, and pound of liverwurst and exits the Shop Rite Deli. While on his drive home, the man notices his check engine light on in his car. "Oh, what the hell." the man complains.
Late at night, with not many stores open. The man decides to pull into the Hammonton Roll-Away, and ask to use their telephone. As the man, opens the front door, he smells a very familiar aroma. He sniffs the air and is delighted at the odor. "It smells like a grilled swiss-cheese sandwich!" the man joyfully yells.
To his surprise, he see's a large slice of Swiss Cheese playing goalie. He turns to one of the spectators and asks a question. "Why is there a large slice of Swiss Cheese playing goal?" the man asks
The spectator replies "He used to be a regular human being goaltender. Than he played a season for the Waterford Whalers, and allowed a record high 12 goals a game. It got so bad that his white blood cells turned into pasteurized Swiss cheese. He tried to fight it. He even went out and bought bigger pads. But it was too late. By the last game of the season, he had completely turned into a slice of Swiss cheese."
The man walks up to the large slice of Swiss Cheese. "Hey, I just was at the Shop Rite, and they are completely out of you. Would you be interested, working at the Deli Counter?" the man asked
The Large piece of Swiss Cheese replies "No, its too late. I'm already on the Shop Rite Men's roller hockey team. And I'm itching for a victory against those Waterford Whalers on November 18 at 10pm. Boytanio you are going down! This time the Swiss will be back, and I'm ready to transform into my human form again. People will be praising the re-birth of Swiss Cheese Ronda!"
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